Hungry Hungry Hippo

Growing up I thought I had heard all the reasons not to walk around alone after dark. As a child I got the warnings about how it’s harder for cars to see you at night and it’s easier to get lost, and as a girl I got all the warnings about it not being safe because creepers walk around at night. Then when I got to college I got the warning about how nothing good ever happens after midnight (which looking back, I would have to agree with). Over the years I thought I had heard them all. Then I showed up to the beautiful coastal town of St. Lucia, South Africa, where I was given a new reason not to walk around at night. Here you don’t have to worry about drunks stumbling around, or murderers lurking around dark corners, it’s a pretty safe place. That is, until you are walking back from dinner and come face to face with a 5000 lbs. hippo in the middle of the street.

The town of St. Lucia is located right on the edge of the St. Lucia estuary, home to the largest hippopotamus population in the world. I always imagined hippos kind of like the dancing ones on Fantasia. Even when you see them on the Discovery Channel they look so cute with their wiggly ears as they float around in a big muddy pond. I’m just going to add this to my list of things Disney lied to me about as a child. I’m pretty sure any animal loses the cute factor when they are bigger than a minivan and have teeth longer than bananas, and just to set the record straight, they don’t dance around in tutus.

My week long vacation started by meeting up with my friend, and fellow volunteer, Monica in Durban. From there we made the trek to the town of Manguzi, near the Mozambique boarder to spend a few days at another volunteer’s site. We met up with Briana, got some groceries, and then hopped in the back of a caged pickup truck to head to her village. Briana’s village could not be more different than mine. First of all she is in the tropics, and it is HOT. Being close to the boarder and only about an hour from the ocean her village is situated among sandy dunes and is infested with every creepy crawling bug known to mankind. I use the term infested because even after nine months in Africa I would rather never see an ant or dung beetle ever again. It’s also home to two of the most aggressive snakes in the world, the black mamba and the puff adder, but we were fortunate enough to not run into any of those.

Our big adventure in Manguzi was paying a local to drive us through the back roads to the beach. We were going to spend the day soaking up some much needed vitamin D with Briana’s host family and their friend (who was our driver). We assumed that since they were all locals that they would know how to get to the beach we were aiming for, but unfortunately we were wrong. The driver kept leaning out the window of the truck to ask us if we knew how to get there. It apparently never occurred to him that the white girls from out of town would have no idea where we were going, hence why we paid him to drive us. So after a few wrong turns, and a few sandy hills that we got stuck on, we made it to the beach…just not the right beach. Being the easy going Americans we figured a beach is a beach and the one we were at would be just as good as the one we were aiming for, right? Wrong!!! We hadn’t even had time to get out of the truck bed when we were approached by three men in uniform, carrying very large rifles. Nothing says “you are not welcome here” like an automatic rifle. Turns out that we had unknowingly entered a protected wildlife area that was not open to the public, and that was being monitored by South Africa’s equivalent to park rangers. Except these park rangers carry big guns rather than flashlights and radios. Fortunately they believed the obviously foreign white girls that we were just lost and were looking for the public beach a few dirt roads over. They were kind enough to not shoot us and even gave us directions on how to get the hell out of there! Looking back it is an entertaining story to tell, but in the moment nothing makes you want to pee your pants more than big guys with guns in a foreign country where you hardly speak the language.

So after that fun little detour we finally made it to one of the most beautiful beaches I have ever seen. It kind of reminded me of the scene from the beginning of the second Jurassic Park. All you could see where miles and miles of undeveloped beaches with huge hills covered in tropical jungle plants rising up behind the sand. The Indian Ocean is a beautiful blue and so refreshing after spending two hours riding in the back of a truck on a hot day. We spent the day playing with Briana’s host siblings and lounging on the beach. Of course I got sun burnt  again, but this time I blame my friends because I only got burnt on my back where it was their job to apply the sun screen. Apparently it is impossible for me to go to the beach and not get burnt.

So after a few days of lounging around and an amazing day at the beach, we left Manguzi to spend a few days back in the land of restaurants and showers in St Lucia. The first thing you notice when you enter this little town are the road signs. Who would have thought you would ever need a hippo crossing sign, especially in the middle of town. When we finally made it to the backpacker that we were staying at we were greeted with another sign. On the back of every door leading out of the building there was a warning about hippos roaming free after dark. No joke, hippos walk up from the estuary at night to find a nice little grass area to chow down on. It just so happens that many of these hippo dining areas are people’s front yards. Who needs a lawn mower when you have a herd of hippos?

Like most Americans none of us had ever seen a hippo outside of the zoo, so our first adventure was to go on a hippo/croc tour that evening. Briana was a little hesitant to get on a small boat with mesh railing to get right up close and personal with some hippos. Turns out some people in her village had recently been attacked by hippos, and one guy was killed. Once again, Disney lied, wild animals don’t always want to be your friend, and hippos are super mean. You don’t ever want to piss one off, and you especially don’t want to get between a mom and her baby, unless the idea of being skewered by a banana size tooth appeals to you. However, after a little reassurance that we would not get eaten by any wild animals we got on a little boat to find some hungry hungry hippos, and it was amazing! This two hour boat ride at sunset was by far the coolest thing I have done in Africa so far. I set out thinking I would see maybe a few hippos here and there, but they were everywhere. Turns out hippos hang out in family type clusters usually with multiple females and their babies with one or two big males depending on the group size. The guide was careful to not put the boat between the moms and their babies, but we were able to get right up next to them. While the babies were super cute, the big males kind of still scare the crap out of me. They are huge, and they make some super strange noises. They kind of sound like Butch when he snores really loud. They like to grunt at each other as a way to show dominance. I didn’t find it a very attractive noise, but based on the number of babies we saw the female hippos sure liked it!

We unfortunately were about two weeks too late for crocodile season, but we were able to find one female still hanging out on shore. Turns out she built her nest a little too close to the water’s edge, and her nest flooded during the rain. Most other nests hatched a few weeks earlier, but this mom was still guarding the nest and trying to keep it warm in the hope that her babies would hatch. It was super sad hearing the guide tell us the story while watching this croc just sit there above the water line. I’m pretty sure it was the first time I ever wanted to cuddle a crocodile.

After this epic first night of animal watching we spent the majority of our time in St. Lucia eating real food, taking a lot of showers, and attempting to avoid running into two ton hippos on the sidewalk. It was a pretty fantastic vacation and I was able to add a bunch of animals to my list.

Animals seen in Africa

Ostriches

Peacocks

Zebras

Baboons

Monkeys

Mongooses  

Water buffalo

Springbok

Wildebeest

Hippopotamuses  

Crocodile